I think it is a beautiful, mysterious thing that the Lord gives us the desires of our heart. Not what our heart wants but what our heart should want. My mom often tells me that if we knew what God knows, we would choose God's will for our lives every time. I'm often reminded that to know the will of God we have to know the mind of God and to know the mind of God we have to know the Word of God. Lately I've been thinking about what I want to be as an old lady. When I was at EXCEL I remember Mrs. Bell telling us, "Everyday you're becoming what you're going to be when you're an old lady". I want my life to be defined by qualities that come only as I spend time in the presence of Jesus, rejoicing in trials, faithful in the little things. On the other hand, I don't want my life to be defined by what I own, my intelligence, or anything else that is superficial. As I get older (I'm currently the ripe old age of 22), the Lord is opening my eyes to see and narrowing my view to focus on only the things that are important in light of eternity. Waiting no longer seems as big a chore because every moment is a once in a lifetime opportunity. This is especially true of my years of being single...there is a quota either way, fulfilled by marriage or death. I've noticed a transition in my attitude toward "waiting" so to speak. My time and thoughts used to be filled with anxiety and worry...not quite to an obsessive point...about when and how Mr. Right would come along. How shallow is that!! I serve the ETERNAL God of the universe and I'm WORRIED about my future with another person...something that I'm not even promised in the first place, something that won't fulfill my deepest desires, and something that in and of itself doesn't carry on into eternity. All that to say, I just want to love God and to say as David says in the Psalms, "My heart waits on God only, for my hope is in Him"!! The thing that inspired this post was the following quote (which I think is really sweet and good to remember, by the way):
“Wait for the man who pursues you, the one who will make an ordinary moment seem magical, the kind of man who brings out the best in you and makes you want to be a better woman. Wait for the man who will be your best friend, the one who will drop everything to be with you. Wait for the man who makes you smile like no other guy makes you smile. Wait for the man who respects and loves you for who you are, not who everyone else wants you to be. Wait for the man who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats and no makeup, but loves it when you get all dolled up for him. Wait for the man who praises God for you, and encourages you daily in your walk, and most importantly, wait for the man who is more in love with God than you." -- Unknown
Don't get me wrong, I will be the first person to jump up and yell if asked who doesn't want to settle for less than godly character in someone of the opposite sex. So, while waiting on God's best is important, I think that the key is: Waiting for GOD. I always feel like I'm "spinning my tires" and get burnt out when I lose sight and begin to wait on a guy. Of course, all this is easier said that done in a culture where a young person's identity, capability, and success are determined by whether they have a significant other or not.
Haha...all this may seem redundant based on previous posts but it's something that the Lord is consistently showing me more about and renewing in my heart. I hope it encourages someone out there. 